IMPERFECT ME 15

EPISODE 15

Rachael hit the bed with serious back ache, she did not expect that people would still want to come and visit but the Sunday was not as quiet as she wanted. She helped herself with some fruits in the fridge and decided to microwave the food her mum had sent, she did not know there was food until he opened the back door and brought out the warmer. She rendered a silent prayer of thanks to God for that. Just when she entered her room, after a cold shower. She was just climbing the bed when she heard laughter from the living room. She refused to go out but of course he called her out and pretending not to hear would be an obvious lie. And that was how, she was on her feet serving and pretending to be happy while he laughed and talked with the guests, he was the perfect host, he even covered up for her saying his pretty wife was tired.
At 8:30pm they saw the last set off and she dragged herself inside the room and fell on the bed with a loud thud.
“You really should not be doing that.” Michael said standing by the door, leaning back on the door frame.
“What?” She said raising her head to look at him.
“I said you should not be jumping on the bed like that, you are carrying my baby okay?”
“Michael please just let me be okay, I don’t have energy to shout tonight.” She said dragging her weak self into a sitting position and she winced at the pain in her back and her legs.
“Of course you don’t have energy.” He said with sarcasm and turned to go.
“Michael…”
“Yes!” He turned.
“Please can you help me … I … my back aches and I was wondering if you would not mind massaging it for….I mind.” He said and banged the door. The sound made her jitter. She swallowed hard as tears rolled down her eyes. She had the strongest urge to call her mum  but she did not want to disturb the poor woman tonight.
She knew it was going to be a long night and she hope to God that sleep departs from him as it definitely might not favor her also.
She woke up past 7am only to come out and find him all dressed up for work.
“I did not want to wake you up. I left some money on the dining table in case you need anything. Have a nice day.” He picked his car key and walked out of the door before she could say anything.
He sure is a handsome man but well he will not be getting any compliments from her. Meanwhile she needed to speak to her mum before she loses her mind.
She was already dosing off on the three sitter when her phone buzzed. It was her mum knocking on the door and when she got no response she decided to call.
“Mummy  I am sorry, I didn’t know when I slept off.” She said opening the door and giving her mum a bear hug.
“Mummy I miss you so much, please let me follow you back home please, I can’t survive one more day with that brute.” She said but her mum gently disengaged her from the hug when she called him a brute.
“Rachael what has come over you huh! Did I just hear you call your husband a brute?”
“But mummy Michael is so mean and inconsiderate, all he cares about is the baby, I don’t count to him, he hates me and so do I.” She said leading her in.
“Haa Jesus Christ save me. This girl will not put me to shame.”
“Rachael I see how much he tries to make you comfortable but you have always been mean to him too. I know this is not what any of you bargained for but you are in it now okay and it’s till death does you part and none of you will die in Jesus name.” Her mum said.
“Mummy, it’s been so hard. I get so angry for nothing, yes he tries but it feels like forever and we are not even a week old. I feel so mad at myself, him, even God, yes I know that’s being unreasonable but mummy I thought they said God forgives sins huh! I see other people in our shoes but they seem to be doing fine.” She complained.
“Rachael, people will only show what they want you to see and you should count your blessings and not talk like foolish women. You got better training than this.”
“Mummy nothing feels right, I feel God is far and does not care anymore. I feel so lonely and confused. I am tired of the fight, I want to be happy again.” She cried and her mum comforted her.
“I know how much I prayed for you to end up with a good man and God answers prayer, though it does not look like it now but Rachael, a wise woman builds her home but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hand.”
“Mummy, I don’t think there is any remedy for this marriage.” She said shifting her weight in the chair.
“There is always a remedy. Both of you are just being stubborn but then one has to step down for the other, when everybody is talking, no one is communicating. Rachael the bible said wives submit to your husbands, the bible did not say submit if the husband is acting right or wrong, why not give it a try, don’t just throw words back in his face, you will not go far that way.” Her mum warned.
“But mum, you and dad have a perfect marriage, he treats you well, loves and cares for you and everyone is happy. Michael is just so annoying and inconsiderate.”
“Hahaha! Baby no marriage is perfect, I and your father have had our fair share of troubles, I only wish I learnt fast enough, you are lucky you have a mother who knows a lot, I learnt the hard way and I don’t want that for you.” Her mum said worried.
“Mum would I not look awkward trying to act nice, would he not think me strange? I can’t let him take me for a fool.”
“Well you are not ready for peace and trust me, it will be bad to keep having to shout and worry in this condition. You should rest more, I don’t want your blood pressure rising, you are too young for that and you should start your antenatal, that’s part of the reason I came. The one you registered near the house might be too far, we would fix a date and go to the hospital outside your estate, I heard their services are good too.”
“Yes mummy but I don’t feel like I can face those accusing eyes, I just got married and people who did not know will now know why I married.” She said pouting.
“Well they should talk all they can, I care about your health and that of the child. That’s what you should worry about.” Her mum said annoyed.
“Okay mum, I hear you, I think I need emotional healing first.” She said.
“What you need is God and some sense  to be a virtuous woman. Baby I know deep down in your heart is the love you had for him, we will pray now and God will help you love your husband. Do the right thing irrespective of what he does, don’t reply back when he is spiting you, tell him you are sorry, you could kneel down and apologize so he can…”
“No!!! mum that will be pushing it, i can’t kneel down now when he obviously won’t be helping me get up from the ground. My back aches too often lately.” She complained.
“Okay I hear you but you can’t continue this way. You have to make the first move even if he does not. A woman has to do what she can to make her house a home. We will pray and ask God for mercy and his grace. You sure need plenty doses of his grace.
“Yes mummy I really do, if God does not intervene I don’t know who else can.” She said making a resolution in her heart to start working on the change. She needed the marriage to work if not for anything, she would not want her unborn children come into such a mess called family, she wanted things like they should be and she would achieve it by God’s grace. But what if he is not willing to change?  Will she continue like a fool?

LESSON
People will only show you what they want you to see therefore,never compare yourself with anybody.

Radiant Pheobe © 2017